I'm just stuck, frozen, the thought of a life without him makes me lose all ambition, everything I used to love wouldn't matter after that point.. that is honesty and no it's not a plea for pity, I dont want sympathy it's just how I truly feel everytime I think of moving on from him.. which makes me question why am I trying to, he has always been faithful to me; but here I am ruining myself and what we had.. maybe I really am just worthless
I don't know if this will be of use, but at another forum, a similar situation was presented under the title "How Does A Zoo Deal With The Death Of Their Animal, How?".
This was the answer I gave, itself a re-presenting of my reply to an even earlier post:
--------------------------------------------
I had addressed the situation in a reply to another post, a poll, titled "Where Are Your Zoo Scars?"
But that thread is several pages away now.
Here is that reply:
"Where Are Your Zoo Scars?, Where's your animal lover left his mark?"
A small one on my forearm, where a dear partner and I during oral contact, lost balance and I caught a claw. She was unharmed. That was decades ago, and the pale scar has almost completely faded away.
But as said by others before, the largest, deepest, most persistent, most painful, and most crippling scars are in the mind, aka, the "heart". She died of age, and that scar of her death is and will always be far deeper and more present than all the scars and debilitations of all the physical wounds I have received over my sixty years.
The same with all the others in my life that have fallen to the ravages of time.
And it goes beyond the cardiac metaphor also. Recent medical studies have confirmed what many have long felt or known, that the stresses of loss, mourning, and grief can cause actual physical damage to your heart, your immune system, your mental health, and possibly other physiological systems and functions as well.
In that respect, in extreme cases or with a pre-existing condition, people can actually die from a "broken heart".
The damage from these losses can never be wholly undone, the hole never filled, and the place they held in us never rebuilt.
The best we can do - and MUST do - is to build a NEW place in ourselves for a new love, never tearing down or "replacing" the old places, but having for them a brand-new place in your life, uniquely their own.
Never forget your lost loves. But do not let those losses shut the doors to new love.
Resident Hyaena ^..^
11-27-2017, 08:52 AM
(This post was last modified: 11-27-2017, 09:05 AM by Cynolove693.)
I know you guys are right, but it still doesn't feel right... Hhhhhhh....
But like a friend told me already, one way or another I'll move on and find new love; or I'll end up back with my old lover..
Idk I just feel lonely with the dog I have now, he rarely shows affection, and I don't want our relationship to be about lust, I'm not looking for that, I want to have romance in our relationship; problem is it seems that's not what my dog wants.
What I'm saying here is I'd rather have a Platonic relationship with my dog if he's not willing to be intimate.. sex really isn't an necessity
Things are going better, me and my dog are bonding more, although im keeping our relationship platonic for the time being; I honestly feel like shit I even thought of rehoming my dog to go back to trying to be with a dog that's not even mine; I made a commitment to my dog when I got him; and I'm not gonna back out of it; that's not me, It was just really hard for me to let go..
I loved my previous lover so much to the point I wasn't thinking right; to the point that I was looking for him in my dog and was depressed that I couldn't find a dog like him; I almost lost sense of who I am trying to follow a dream that will never happen; trying to go for something that wasn't meant to be....
