It´s quite obvious to outsiders because you cannot hide true love. For example, the owner of the stables my mare stood at before her death only took about 4 week until he told me that "It´s clear that you and your mare have a very special relationship with each other", only 4 weeks until he recognised although he never had seen or known me before. And in the case I described in my previous post, the owner of the small private stables already knew me for a long time from the riding club I started as a hobby rider, became an apprentice and finally became a riding teacher. I even suspect that my "special relationship with horses" was what made her offer me the last box in her stables. Despite being one of those "animal fuckers", I literally was "handpicked" by her. So I hadn´t an adrenaline rush or flight reflex when overhearing her and her father. It still was kinda unpleasant to hear for me...if you lead a life so entirely dependent on not giving away your orientation, you cannot deny the pinching stings of subconscious fear.And no, you cannot imagine the grimace I was displaying...thank god that I wasn´t in company of anyone else or my face would have signalled "Guilty as charged!", but only for a millisecond... [img]<fileStore.core_Emoticons>/emoticons/wink.png[/img]/emoticons/ [email protected] 2x" title=";)" width="20" />
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12 hours ago, 30-30 said:
Well, there might be a Ford patch on that tractor, but it´s basically a Massey Ferguson hiding underneath the hull...and I really learned to hate MFs when I was an apprentice since the riding club I was working in only had those "M other F uck, call the mechanic!" tractors. [img]<fileStore.core_Emoticons>/emoticons/wink.png[/img]/emoticons/[email protected] 2x" title=";)" width="20" /> We had two Polish stablehands back then...and one thing you have to know about the Poles, they can build a running car out of a bicycle wheel, a few matches and four screws...but they couldn´t repair our two MF tractors most of the time. Ask any German farmer what MF stands for and he will tell you it stands for "mechanics friendly" , saving the mechanics´ jobs for decades... [img]<fileStore.core_Emoticons>/emoticons/wink.png[/img]/emoticons/[email protected] 2x" title=";)" width="20" />
That would be truly funny if the Massey Ferguson and the Fendt weren't made in the same factory. Both are AGCO products and as such differ only in paint color and other decorations.
You will find at least some MF in almost every tractor made because the technical name for the universal three point lift system used by everyone is "the Ferguson System".
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3 hours ago, 30-30 said:
It´s quite obvious to outsiders because you cannot hide true love. For example, the owner of the stables my mare stood at before her death only took about 4 week until he told me that "It´s clear that you and your mare have a very special relationship with each other", only 4 weeks until he recognised although he never had seen or known me before. And in the case I described in my previous post, the owner of the small private stables already knew me for a long time from the riding club I started as a hobby rider, became an apprentice and finally became a riding teacher. I even suspect that my "special relationship with horses" was what made her offer me the last box in her stables. Despite being one of those "animal fuckers", I literally was "handpicked" by her. So I hadn´t an adrenaline rush or flight reflex when overhearing her and her father. It still was kinda unpleasant to hear for me...if you lead a life so entirely dependent on not giving away your orientation, you cannot deny the pinching stings of subconscious fear.And no, you cannot imagine the grimace I was displaying...thank god that I wasn´t in company of anyone else or my face would have signalled "Guilty as charged!", but only for a millisecond... [img]<fileStore.core_Emoticons>/emoticons/wink.png[/img]/emoticons/[email protected] 2x" title=";)" width="20" />
Well at least that's a very deep way to give away your sexuality.
What would you do if someone came at your face suddenly asking if you fuck horses?... (this happened to me, even when he said dogs, as a guy was just trying to troll me and that was the first thing that came to his head, for a millisecond I was like red, I denied of course, that was so random [img]<fileStore.core_Emoticons>/emoticons/laugh.png[/img]/emoticons/ [email protected] 2x" title="xD" width="20" />)
I wonder if having a relationship with an animal feels as good as one think it does, all the fur, the scents, the closeness.
Damn we are weird. [img]<fileStore.core_Emoticons>/emoticons/laugh.png[/img]/emoticons/ [email protected] 2x" title="xD" width="20" />
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6 hours ago, caikgoch said:
That would be truly funny if the Massey Ferguson and the Fendt weren't made in the same factory. Both are AGCO products and as such differ only in paint color and other decorations.
You will find at least some MF in almost every tractor made because the technical name for the universal three point lift system used by everyone is "the Ferguson System".
Well, if you consider that the Fendt wasn´t bought by myself, but part of the purchase of my farm... and as long as it is working properly, I won´t buy a different tractor. And I still see massive differences in durability between the different brands, MF hasn´t gathered its reputation as "mechanics friendly" for nothing...
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5 hours ago, Cat said:
Well at least that's a very deep way to give away your sexuality.
What would you do if someone came at your face suddenly asking if you fuck horses?... (this happened to me, even when he said dogs, as a guy was just trying to troll me and that was the first thing that came to his head, for a millisecond I was like red, I denied of course, that was so random [img]<fileStore.core_Emoticons>/emoticons/laugh.png[/img]/emoticons/[email protected] 2x" title="xD" width="20" />)
I wonder if having a relationship with an animal feels as good as one think it does, all the fur, the scents, the closeness.
Damn we are weird. [img]<fileStore.core_Emoticons>/emoticons/laugh.png[/img]/emoticons/[email protected] 2x" title="xD" width="20" />
What I would do? The only thing that´s sane to do in that scenario, deny, deny, deny. Unless it´s a person you know well and is a close friend you have nothing to fear from, denial is the only way to react.
How a relationship with an animal feels like, what it is like, the deepness...well, I´d say that´s largely dependent on the person involved. I´ve seen enough so called "zoos" who all say they´re "so deeply in love with their animal", but objectively don´t show much affection towards it besides sex. And you may be surprised how little the relevance of "the fur and the scents" really is if you aren´t a fetishist for fur and smells. I do not love my mare for her physical traits, I predominantly love her because of her personality, the soul behind the body. In the end, it´s your own ability to develop selfless love that defines how deep a relationship with an animal gets. Not fur or scents.
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1 hour ago, 30-30 said:
What I would do? The only thing that´s sane to do in that scenario, deny, deny, deny. Unless it´s a person you know well and is a close friend you have nothing to fear from, denial is the only way to react.
How a relationship with an animal feels like, what it is like, the deepness...well, I´d say that´s largely dependent on the person involved. I´ve seen enough so called "zoos" who all say they´re "so deeply in love with their animal", but objectively don´t show much affection towards it besides sex. And you may be surprised how little the relevance of "the fur and the scents" really is if you aren´t a fetishist for fur and smells. I do not love my mare for her physical traits, I predominantly love her because of her personality, the soul behind the body. In the end, it´s your own ability to develop selfless love that defines how deep a relationship with an animal gets. Not fur or scents.
Well sexuality comes from something, and that something is usually some form or idea of stimuli, and after that you fall in love for what that stimuli belongs from, you didn't fall in love for a disembodied soul, you fall in love with horses because they are horse shaped, horse smelling, horse acting, horse everything... otherwise, why not another animal, why not humans? there are humans with pure souls as well.
I love the animal, don't get me wrong, I am far from a fetishist, but the sensations that I imagine I can get from I wonder if it would fill this emotional void, I love animal's fur, scents and attitude; if it wasn't I'd not be zoo, and I'd take the least friction path and chose humans with a great soul, in fact I've met amazing people with humble personalities, and it has hurted me a lot the fact I am unable to feel the same way for them simply because they are not animals; that's because it's a sexuality that depends on certain stimuli, otherwise hormones won't be released and you won't feel in love, and that is the pleasure you feel when you are close to your mare, it's dopamine pleasuring you for caring of your mate.
And the fact is that I simply can't fall in love with humans just because they are humans and don't show the traits I'd expect for a mate, no matter how good they are, I can have sex with them, but it doesn't pleasure me, and I still develop no feelings for them (something I learned the hard way); and the fact I expect a specific set of stimuli, doesn't make me a fetishist, that's what makes me zoo basically, I want fur, I want a muzzle on my face, and a wild carefree attitude; the fact that other people do not care of their mates other than for sex, doesn't make me an equal; you don't have idea, how deep I feel this connection with animals is, even when, I haven't been able to experience it first hand, to love and be loved, and I am talking nonsexually.
Ahem....can you imagine that fur and scent doesn´t play much of a role anymore when you´ve had it almost every day since you turned 16? But I know your perspective from the time before I went to a riding club; yet it quickly dwindled after fur and scent became an integral part of my everyday life...even moreso after I became a pro rider and lived most of my time around horses. It just becomes a non issue somehow...up to the point when friends say "you´re smelling like a horse yourself" and you are surprised to hear that simply because you don´t really smell it yourself anymore. Like a fish that has no grip of the idea of water...
So, why not humans? First of all, because I highly doubt there are humans with a "pure soul"...even Mother Theresa wasn´t that, even Ghandi wasn´t that although Mahatma translates to "great/ pure soul". My firm belief is that the ego keeps humans from developing a pure soul at all. Now you can ask "Why not another non human species?" I´ll answer that with one word: resonance. There´s something in horses that makes my soul resonate with them, something that transcends physical attraction. I can´t put it in word better that this, really. And how do you explain that: before I bought my first mare, I wanted to have a Cremello mare so bad. The white and pink appearance just fascinated me on an aesthetic and erotic level...but the mare I was with for 22 years of my life, my soulmate turned out to be a chestnut brown Hannover mare that completely differed from my "ideal mare". Also, why is it that I can meet mares I cannot even imagine being attracted to at all although they too have fur and smell like a horse smells? And , to be honest, those are the majority...so it obviously isn´t dependent on fur, scent and horse body for me at all. Why did it take only a second of eye contact with my Hannover mare when I helped unload her from the trailer to completely fall in love with her despite the fact that she wasn´t exactly what I was yearning for? In retrospective, that split second taught me more about love than anything else in my life...it´s absolutely not about body, fur and smell. It´s about personality...and that is what I´m falling in love with in mares. I´m attracted to self confident mares, to mares who have their own ideas, to mares who have bright eyes and a strong personality. Like two oscillating waves perfectly matching in frequency and altitude modulation so they become one indistinguable symbiotic and inseparable wave. I´m in my 40s and haven´t had that "click" moment with any human I ever met, only with mares ...and only with very few, select mares, to be precise. I could own a hudered mares, all with horse bodies, fur and horse scents...but to engage in a relationship, that isn´t what it takes for me. It takes more. At least for me. Thus I´m not really impressed by body and smell anymore...especially when we´re talking about a really deep connection/relationship. Even when I bought my other three mares who I had no interest in having sex with at all, I searched for that "self confident, yet playful" soul, that special kind of "aura". Because that´s the "glue" that makes me stick to a mare like my Hannover lady for 22 years without cheating on her even once although I´ve had more than enough chances to do so without negative repercussions. I even declined an "offer" from a Cremello mare once without hesitation...one of those I was so yearning for to sleep with in my beginnings. I really hope you will experience such a "click!" moment yourself...once you did, there´s no need to talk about body, fur and scent anymore and you will perfectly understand my point of view.
05-29-2018, 06:04 AM
(This post was last modified: 05-29-2018, 06:05 AM by Cat.)
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4 hours ago, 30-30 said:
Ahem....can you imagine that fur and scent doesn´t play much of a role anymore when you´ve had it almost every day since you turned 16? But I know your perspective from the time before I went to a riding club; yet it quickly dwindled after fur and scent became an integral part of my everyday life...even moreso after I became a pro rider and lived most of my time around horses. It just becomes a non issue somehow...up to the point when friends say "you´re smelling like a horse yourself" and you are surprised to hear that simply because you don´t really smell it yourself anymore. Like a fish that has no grip of the idea of water...
So, why not humans? First of all, because I highly doubt there are humans with a "pure soul"...even Mother Theresa wasn´t that, even Ghandi wasn´t that although Mahatma translates to "great/ pure soul". My firm belief is that the ego keeps humans from developing a pure soul at all. Now you can ask "Why not another non human species?" I´ll answer that with one word: resonance. There´s something in horses that makes my soul resonate with them, something that transcends physical attraction. I can´t put it in word better that this, really. And how do you explain that: before I bought my first mare, I wanted to have a Cremello mare so bad. The white and pink appearance just fascinated me on an aesthetic and erotic level...but the mare I was with for 22 years of my life, my soulmate turned out to be a chestnut brown Hannover mare that completely differed from my "ideal mare". Also, why is it that I can meet mares I cannot even imagine being attracted to at all although they too have fur and smell like a horse smells? And , to be honest, those are the majority...so it obviously isn´t dependent on fur, scent and horse body for me at all. Why did it take only a second of eye contact with my Hannover mare when I helped unload her from the trailer to completely fall in love with her despite the fact that she wasn´t exactly what I was yearning for? In retrospective, that split second taught me more about love than anything else in my life...it´s absolutely not about body, fur and smell. It´s about personality...and that is what I´m falling in love with in mares. I´m attracted to self confident mares, to mares who have their own ideas, to mares who have bright eyes and a strong personality. Like two oscillating waves perfectly matching in frequency and altitude modulation so they become one indistinguable symbiotic and inseparable wave. I´m in my 40s and haven´t had that "click" moment with any human I ever met, only with mares ...and only with very few, select mares, to be precise. I could own a hudered mares, all with horse bodies, fur and horse scents...but to engage in a relationship, that isn´t what it takes for me. It takes more. At least for me. Thus I´m not really impressed by body and smell anymore...especially when we´re talking about a really deep connection/relationship. Even when I bought my other three mares who I had no interest in having sex with at all, I searched for that "self confident, yet playful" soul, that special kind of "aura". Because that´s the "glue" that makes me stick to a mare like my Hannover lady for 22 years without cheating on her even once although I´ve had more than enough chances to do so without negative repercussions. I even declined an "offer" from a Cremello mare once without hesitation...one of those I was so yearning for to sleep with in my beginnings. I really hope you will experience such a "click!" moment yourself...once you did, there´s no need to talk about body, fur and scent anymore and you will perfectly understand my point of view.
I hope so it sounds kind of cute and everything to feel that way, you sound like an old romantic dude speaking about his lover :p, but having never experienced what it is like to have a relationship I cannot say for sure what it is like to love; all what I feel right now is yearning, that pattern of attitude, colors, experiences, fur, scents, etc... I know what attracts me but I don't know how it would pan out in the practical sense, my contact with animals has been pretty limited, classic city boy who turns out zoo without even having had much contact with animals; all I have now is expectations, I am making my planning, but I find it to be painfully slow.
That saying I know the feeling of getting used to something to the point it feels like nothing, it's like filling a void; something you always needed to feel "normal"; the urges I get to be with an animal are somewhat really intense and bothersome, and affects my physical health, I want to cuddle to or before sleep, but I can't, so I remain awake, and sometimes I remain daydreamy about being with an animal in a current circumstance, usually good ones, like getting to the center of a forest, or climbing a large hill, and I'll want to share that moment, but that is not possible, and it seriously hurt, and the thing about being a zoo is that you can't vent out with anyone pretty much; it just seems everyone needs affection, but maybe once you get that, it's not like increasing your happiness or anything, but rather just filling a need you've got or who knows?... either to be frustrated with some outcomes or to be amazed at how much better some things are, for good or for bad, it is what it is, or rather, it'll be.
Whatever it is, it just hurts the lack of it, and I highly doubt a fetishist would feel that way; for a fetishist animals are a sexual toy, for me, they are much more; they are living beings with feelings and emotions, and I really want to share my life moments with an adventurous one of this kind, so we can go around together, explore forests, climb hills, conquer frozen landscapes, and eventually cuddle, mutual groom each other, and hopefully have sex together; if what I feel is not love, or a yearning for love, I don't know what it is.
PS. Wait you are a pro rider? [img]<fileStore.core_Emoticons>/emoticons/blink.png[/img]/emoticons/ [email protected] 2x" title="O.o" width="20" />
05-29-2018, 03:42 PM
(This post was last modified: 05-29-2018, 03:45 PM by 30-30.)
I don´t know whether calling me a romantic guy is appropriate, at least in the more conventional and common definition of a romantic. People believing in astrology/horoscopes would say I´m a typical capricorn: down to earth, faithful to his partner up to the point of complete devotion etc. When I fall in love with a mare, I fall in love entirely, unconditionally. But I don´t believe in astrology and highly doubt that star constellations in the sky have an actual influence on me...the typical sceptical, down to earth capricorn... [img]<fileStore.core_Emoticons>/emoticons/wink.png[/img]/emoticons/ [email protected] 2x" title=";)" width="20" />
What I would recommend is that you shouldn´t build up too much expectations when fantasizing about your future life as an active zoophile. Sure, before I decided to join a riding club, I also had these fantasies...how it would be with a mare by my side. But one thing I can say for sure: it will always turn out different than what those idealised fantasies tell you. I´m more of a guy that uses the energies wasted on fantasizing for actually make things happen in real life...and adapt in order to create my life the way I want it to be as closely as possible to my ideals. So, if you really want a life with an animal, place your focus on creating it rather than painting it in the brightest pictures. Make sure your life´s path will give you the possibilities to achieve your goals; find a good job that allows you to provide for your future animal in the best way possible...and as a zoophile, it´s always preferrable to have a house of your own, regardless of your preferred species, but especially when it´s farm animals like horses and cows. What you do in real life is what matters...start working on that as soon as possible.
Wow, you really seem to have been hit by me mentioning fetishism. Don´t put too much emphasis on this, but always keep in mind that fur, scent and physical appearance can and will never make up for the lack of true closeness of the souls involved. Much like someone who is "totally into big breasted women"...take away the big tits and see how quickly "love" will disappear. That´s what I meant with fetishism here...the "pars pro toto" problem when focusing too much on physical appearance, body traits and such. Sure, my mare´s body indeed is an erotically loaded entity for me, but I have understood that body traits are just the surface and don´t mean too much anymore when you discover more, go deeper, get to really know your quadruped partner...if you both find pleasure and peace in each other´s company, bodies won´t contribute much anymore. I just value love more than "love for fur, scent and appearance" from my own , personal experience. And, as I said before, once you get used to having fur, scent etc..its significance rapidly dwindles.
Regarding your last question: Yes, I am what we Germans call a "Berufsreiter" /professional rider...a person that earns his living from working fulltime in the equestrian "industry". In Germany, you need to go through three years of apprenticeship and then pass exams to rightfully acquire your job´s title; there are two major branches , one is called "Pferdewirt , Schwerpunkt Zucht und Haltung, the other is called "Pferdewirt, Schwerpunkt Reiten"...and I´m the latter, being qualified and trained to give riding lessons. Those both branches differ in what level of riding skills you have to gather and the "Zucht und Haltung" (breeding and horsekeeping) guys have more knowledge on, well, breeding and horsekeeping while the "Schwerpunkt Reiten" guys are the ones who are standing in the riding hall, giving lessons and are more trained in both dressage and showjumping. I worked almost two decades as a riding instructor, employed by different riding clubs, but after the death of my mare in January 2016, I quit my job for my own mental balance. If my family hadn´t made the purchase of my farm possible, I´d probably stand in a riding hall again now, teaching the spoiled sons and daughters of the wealthy. A rather nervewrecking job, I can tell... [img]<fileStore.core_Emoticons>/emoticons/wink.png[/img]/emoticons/ [email protected] 2x" title=";)" width="20" />
I believe that I have an advantage on you 30-30. I have known both dogs and horses and there is a difference. Dogs are much more contact oriented than horses. Where a horse needs a buddy alert and on watch to sleep, dogs need physical contact with family members to feel secure. Dogs sleep all at the same time for up to twenty hours a day (cats are worse, they usually sleep twenty three hours per day). It's the difference between a predator that gets concentrated food and is efficient about not wasting energy between meals and an herbivore that needs to eat nearly constantly to support a large body.
I wish I had ten cents for every time that I have been awakened during the night because a thunderstorm was approaching and a dog needed my touch to feel secure (I'd buy two more farms). Horses tell me about a problem then look at me to see what I am going to do about it.
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