It took me about 2 1/2 years to get approved, but it feels nice to finally have my disabilities federally recognized...
Self employed isn't where I started. I worked in a family business first. Yes, I am well aware that is a boon many don't have. Still, keep your chin and hopes alive, is all I will say. There's no telling what the future will randomly spit at you one day.
I've had no opportunities in life. I don't see that ever changing, tbh.
As long as the government doesn't try to screw me over with the payments that are owed to me under federal law, I really don't care anymore.
With that said, I will now turn this thread over to someone else...
I thought the same. Wait and see. Life tends to be a large scale waiting game, especially for us.
Finding something good to do while you wait does not hurt though. I like the ideas you've presented re helping feed the homeless, etc. Go for it.
Yes someone else chiming in would be nice, but until then, you have my thoughts.
I know the waiting game all too well.
For some folks, just the first step of getting past the idea that their depression (no matter how bad) is worse than any other and is insurmountable is a challenge. Many of us here have struggled with that first step, some repeatedly, and many have offered advice to other users on getting there.
The thing is though, all the advice in the World isn't going to do shit with-out the motivation to use it and the ability to put it into practice. It's a very personal journey recovering from depression. That last line bugs me when folks say it too, because you don't really. You gain the upper hand. You don't let it lead you, you lead it instead. But it's still there. Depression doesn't go away. You can decide what effect it has on your life though, to a point.
It's harder still when you have other mental issues going on. For me it's PTSD. Depression worsens with sleep deprivation, and constant nightmares see to it I sleep an average 1-3 hours a night un-medicated. Increased and unfounded fear, daymares, paranoia and anxiety help to limit social contact and activity thus increasing depression. I can only imagine what it's like for those with more serious mental health issues, or actually I can't and don't want to.
You'll notice another trend in this thread with depression, folks with it also chiming in on the other physical disability discussions. When you can't do things, especially when you have to depend on someone else to do them, depression worsens. It's hard to feel good about things when you can't even wipe yer own ass. I can, now. It took a long time, and a welder, but the pride of that adaptation working did a lot for my depression.
Grief. Believe it or not, my depression started before my physical condition deteriorated. In the 80s I was asked to leave the military because my physical condition there had dropped to where I could no longer function as a soldier. That's when I met Tippy. I could still hike with her 15-20 miles, train horses for a living, do most anything. It was her death in 98 that had me sunk into the deepest depression possible. Had me hating the sun. Had me feeling nothing. Had a gun in my mouth. Lucky for me, I had come online in 99 and met Big Al, and without really knowing it he talked me down.
Depression makes you sick. That's right. When you're depressed, you let the other health issues you have worsen and you get new ones, and you don't care enough to fight them. Neither does your body. Breathing issues are most common, and chronic pain follows. They worsen, and you move less because of them. Other systems begin to weaken from lowered activity, and immune response fails for the most simple illnesses. A common cold can lay you down for weeks.
Fighting this, fighting all this, seems impossible. It's not. Don't try to beat it in one day, or beat the depression as a whole right off. Set small goals. "Today I'm going to the store, alone." or "Today I'll get out of bed before noon." etc. and make them a daily habit. Slowly, you take charge and become boss of your own mind, hopefully for good.
Just my thoughts on the subject.
sw
11-30-2019, 03:36 PM
(This post was last modified: 11-30-2019, 03:38 PM by HorseHoof.)
I think, for me, it runs deeper than just having depression. I already know what would fix it. The maddening thing is not being able to. Other people think the solution is simple, but it's not. I know my limits better than anyone.
Well, on the bright side, I'll spend less money overall since I can't really do much.
An aside. A friend of mine, a fellow Vet battling depression, has a little trick I also find helpful. On his wall he keeps a checklist of daily activities that tell him how he is coping each morning. If he has done all of them, he is coping well. More often though, the checklist gives him a reminder TO do these things and helps start his day off better and with a better attitude. What's on the list?
Get out of bed.
Shower.
Shave.
Get dressed in clean clothes.
Eat breakfast.
Simple things like that. Simple, but with depression sometimes they seem impossible. Just doing them anyway even when you really "don't want to" can change your mood drastically.
I use a list like that now. I force myself to check it off each day. My depression is such that I have included things like "Feed & water the dogs" and "Do the barn chores" on it just in case it gets that bad. It never has, but I check it off each day so I know. They're the only reason I do get out of bed some days, but the list gives me security as well as more accomplishments.
I also have a reminder call from my brother every day making sure I'm up and taking care of them, and an employee to call to take care of them if I absolutely cannot. At the very bottom of my list is one item that has never been checked off yet, "Give them stable homes". Just a reminder of what my depression can lead me to, and what I will do before I let the depression effect their well-being. I even have names and numbers.
The list idea is a good one, even in it's simplest form of a few daily goals. We all tell ourselves we're going to do this or that, but having it on paper just makes it easier to actually follow through on day to day.
sw
I have long-term, monetary goals. For example, I want to actually retire one day, so I set aside whatever I can into stocks (but not in a retirement account because I don't have a job). In a few decades, I hope it is enough to live comfortably.
Short-term goals can be useful for some people, I guess.
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