Jokes

[threelegs]

Okay, I have to warn you, this one is REALLY bad.

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Three handsome crop farmers (brunette, redhead, and blond) liked the same farm-girl. The farm-girl had a big dairy farm.




One day the three farmer friends decided to ask her, who she would like to go out with. Since they were all very handsome, the farm-girl had a hard time deciding, so she proposed a competition




She gave each one a 20 gallon bucket and told them, "Whoever can get the most milk from one of my cows can date me."




That seemed fair so brunette went first, and came back after one hour with 5 gallons of milk. "That’s all I can get from one cow," he said.




The redhead went next and after two hours brought back 7 gallons of milk.




The blond really wanted to win this so he went looking for the largest cow. After eight hours he came back and said, “I tried really hard but your cow was sick, I only got two gallons of cream."




The farm-girl’s bull died the next day.

[heavyhorse]

I'm assuming he died happy....  

[threelegs]

On 6/16/2022 at 8:10 AM, heavyhorse said:




I'm assuming he died happy....  

Shriveled ... depleted ...

[Ramseys]

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[threelegs]

Man, that poodle is just begging to get her fancy 'do messed up ... gotta wonder about the people who did that. All she needs to complete the look is high heels and crotchless fishnets.

[threelegs]

[threelegs]

An Englishman goes up to a Welsh farmer.




Englishman: "That your dog?"




Welshman: "Aye."




Englishman: "Mind if I speak to him?"




Welshman: "Dog don't talk.”




Englishman: "Hey dog, how's it going?"




Dog: "Doing all right."




Welshman: (look of shock)




Englishman: "Is this your owner?" (Pointing at the Welshman)




Dog: "Yep."




Englishman: "How's he treating you?"




Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the park once a week to play."




Welshman: (Look of total disbelief!)




Englishman: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"




Welshman: "Horse don't talk.”




Englishman: "Hey horse, how's it going?"




Horse: "Cool."




Welshman: (Extreme look of shock!)




Englishman: "Is this your owner?" (Pointing to the Welshman)




Horse: "Yep."




Englishman: "How's he treating you?"




Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking, he rides me, brushes me down often and keeps me in a nice stable to protect me from the weather."




Welshman: (Look of total amazement!)




Englishman: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"




Welshman: "That sheep's a fucking liar!!”

[Ramseys]

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[threelegs]

"Fine, then; I'll do it myself."

[threelegs]

Dildog.